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FIRE & ICE
Every entertainment publication has one love and life guru dispensing worldly advice to troubled readers. At BlackAndCoke.com however, we just like to do everything better. So, instead of one guru, we have two: ladies and gentlemen, meet the never shy, sometimes opposing but always wise BlackAndCoke.com advice columnists, Fire and Ice! We all lose our way. If nothing else, Fire and Ice will give you the reality check you need. So write us! |
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Question Monday, April 07, 2008
I am 19 i've been with my boyfriend through thick and thin since i was 15. He has been a major influence in my life for the past 4 yrs so much so that i feel that he has actually become apart of me. My bf is 5yrs older then me an we have a 2yr old boy together and sum might think of us as the perfect couple/family. Thing is for as long as we've been together, I know he has cheated on me and it pains me and tears me apart. I know at the end of the day he loves me and wants to be with me but i dont know if i can take the lying and the cheating any longer!! This man is my heart and soul and he even asked me to marry him. I told him yes (of course) but still I feel that getting married to him would probbly be the biggest mistake cause i fear the cheating won't stop!! I love my baby to death but i can't take this pain any longer and I know that i don't want to be with him as long as he continues his ways, but i just can't seem to let go and actually put my foot down and say BYE!! I can't bring myself to break up our family and when i do he always finds away to keep me from leaving! What should I do? How should I handle this situation?
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- Ice
Ultimately the end result lies in your hands honey, but your better than me I would have been left. Most women settle for it and its okay with them, every woman is different. Some say, "hey he loves me", but honestly LOVE isnt PAIN; so go figure. You know have a child its no longer in your best interest its in the best interest of your son and how you want him to see how MEN should act. Your son will only know what is taught. I wish you all the best, and believe me its wont be easy but you do have the support. Just ask!!!!
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- Fire
While you understand your conflict, DO NOT get married. You are way to young to make such a commitment. ALthough, you've been with him for the last five years you still have not had the chance to live your life to the fullest. You say he's been cheating on you all this time and you are smart enough to realize that what he's doing is not right so go on in a relationship so tainted. I know it might seem easy for me to say but believe me 10 years from now you'll look back and be glad that you did not make a dumb decision. Keep being a poisitive role model for your son and do all you can to make sure that HE does not become a womanizer like his father. Good Luck!!!!
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Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed by the "Fire And Ice" columns are solely the opinions of the person(s) that write them. The opinions stated should not be used as a substitute for advice, programs, or treatment that you would normally receive from a licensed professional, such as a lawyer, doctor, psychiatrist, or financial advisor.
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